Tick tock

So many choices. So little time. In the span of 70 minutes inside a romantic restaurant, 12 men and 12 women smoothed name tags on their shirts and began looking for love.

By the time they were finished, the 27-to46-year-olds who took part in Richmond’s speed dating experiment had forged plenty of new friendships. Their hearts continue to hold out for much more.

"Id like to meet someone and marry again," said Susan, a 37-year-old divorced mother of one. "It’s hard to meet people – quality people – so I thought I’d try this. I don’t like going to nightclubs. I can’t compete with 24-year-olds."

On this recent night at the Melting Pot in Henrico’s West End, Susan positioned herself on a more level playing field. As she sat at her table for two, aglow in candlelight, she could see that those waiting at surrounding booths were approximately the same age. All had been interviewed by It Takes 2, the Innsbrook dating service that arranged the event. Organizers, who select participants based on their interests, commitment to make new friends and their age range, are planning a second one for later this month.

"We really thought this would be something fun to do," said Carrie Daichman, founder of It Takes 2. "In our society, people have so little time. We hope they approach something like this with an open mind. It’s an opportunity to meet new people and make new friends."

Speed dating is hardly a new concept. It’s been featured on a number of television shows, including HBO’s "Sex and the City" and Fox’s "Love Cruise." And singles in larger cities, like New York and Washington, have tried their hand at fast-paced romance.

But in Richmond, speed dating is a new phenomenon. Even in this conservative city, men and women are eager to try new things in the name of love. And in a society where time is as precious as money, speed dating could become a hit. It Takes 2 had little trouble rounding up contestants for its speed dating trial, filling the 24 slots shortly after airing advertisements on local radio stations.

The chosen few met just after dusk to see if they could get lucky in love. Daichman greeted them at the door, handed out nametags and directed them to the private dining area. Singles mingled around the bar until everyone had arrived. Then it was time for some fast and furious rules. Daichman gave everyone a folder containing the first name of each hopeful romantic. The women were assigned a table, from one through 12, and each man was assigned a starting number. He moved in numerical order from there.

The women stayed seated and the men moved every six minutes to their next possible match. A bell sounded every five minutes to let each couple know they had a minute remaining. At the sound of the second bell, men moved to the next table. At the end of the night, each man had spent six minutes with each woman.

"It was enough time to get a feeling whether you wanted to get to know that person better," said Christine, a 34-year-old single mom. "I wanted to see if I could meet any nice men who are not felons and have jobs. It’s hard to meet nice men who have strength of character."

During their short time together at the Melting Pot, singles fired off questions at will and covered any topic they desired – jobs, hobbies, religion, former relationships. To keep track of who was who, they wrote notes in the handy folders describing each person’s looks, likable traits and turnoffs. Scribbled in margins were remarks like "handsome," "non-smoker," "lawyer" and "divorced with kids."

Some women got right to the point, asking, "What are you looking for?" Men didn’t hold back either, questioning women about their job security and desire for children.

When the evening was over, each participant wrote down the first name of anyone they’d like to see again. Daichman called those who matched within a few days to give them each other’s phone numbers.

"This was a great idea," said Rhonda, a thirtysomething legal assistant who scored three matches. "I feel safer doing it this way. And where else can you meet 12 guys in an hour? I don’t think any of us are desperate. We are just here to have fun." The men were equally delighted by the odds.

"There are certain things I’m looking for in a woman that is hard to find…in a bar," said Larry, a 37-year-old divorced sales manager. "Everybody here had that same notion. They just wanted to meet nice people. In five minutes, you got a sense for people and whether there was a physical attraction." The first to admit he’s a tad picky, Larry circled just one woman’s name. The two have been out a few times since.

Others went the opposite route, making lots of selections. In the end, everyone got picked by someone else, and 21 of the 24 had at least one match.

"I woke up the next morning going, ‘What was I thinking?" said Betty, who wrote down eight yeses and walked away with six matches. "I’m not sure I really want to go out with all six. I’m not sure why I picked so many. I guess I was just having fun." Five have contacted her so far, and she’s gone out on several dates. Still, she doesn’t think she’s found Mr. Right. I’m not sure I want all of them to call, but it sure was a boost to my ego," said Betty, a medical assistant. "Twelve guys come to your table to woo you. Who wouldn’t feel good about that?"

With so many choices before them, contestants spend the end of the evening hunched over their notes in corner booths. Some compared observations together as the agonized over their final selections.

"He was gorgeous," one woman whispered while triple checking her list. "The nos were definitely nos," said another. "Two or three I waffling on so I gave them the benefit of the doubt." That was an easy thing to do when the expectations of some were gloom-and-doom low.

"I was afraid because I thought there would be some really freaky people there," said Michelle, 27. "I thought the guys would be total players or total losers. But they weren’t. These were people I’d be happy to spend more time with. I had a great time."

Even those who scored zero matches walked away with a smile. "I was proud of myself for doing it." Said Lisa, a 37-year-old fitness counselor who did not snag a match. "It took a lot of courage for me, so I was happy I did it." While conversing at her table for two, Lisa was certain she could hear the constant ticking of a clock. "I found myself talking very fast," she said with a chuckle. She wasn’t the only one.

"I could have used a little more time," joked Rick, a 37-year-old homebuilder. "I wanted to finish my conversation with a woman without having another man breathing down my back." Still, Rick did experience success, accumulating three matches. He’s been out with two so far. Since wedding bells weren’t ringing on either outing, he’s willing to try again. "I’d certainly do it again," Rick said. "I think we need to experience as many new things as we can to spice up our lives. Maybe I didn’t find a soul mate this time, but it never hurts to try."